Mortality

Oops..I had the same name for the nursing homes so had to correct. Medilodge actually has 14 or 15 of these homes in Michigan.

Well, yesterday was quite a day for me and certainly got me thinking of my own mortality. Two ladies I know are in nursing homes so I took the day (& Mandy) to visit both of them. The first one was a lady I worked with at the Dr's. office for 19 years. Her name is Patty and she was a hoot in addition to just being a good friend. Her health has been declining and recently she was 'put' in a nursing home. I have to say I was shocked to first see her in this state but second to see the state of the nursing home. Sad as well because it doesn't look to me that her family has brought any of her own belongings to the home to at least make her feel somewhat still attached to the real world. How terrible! In addition, the 'home' (and I use this term loosely!) is dark, smelly, just down right depressing! Can I name names..yes, the home is Medilodge in Rochester. OK, nursing homes, hospice homes are just that..I understand...but golly, make the room a little cheery at least! So I'm going back on Monday and I'm going to put some pictures (of my friend and I in our 'old' days) hung up along with taking her some music to listen to.
So that was my first visit and I'm glad it was my first. I then went on to visit another dear lady who is my DIL's grandma, Eileen. Eileen is the sweetest lady and I've always had a soft spot for her. We would only see each other at gatherings at the kids house but I would look forward to talking with her. Eileen is in Medilodge in Sterling Heights and WHAT a difference! This nursing home is delightful, cheery, smells good! and NOT depressing. Eileen's room is decorated so nice with items from home, cards, etc. Now Eileen does have a wonderful support system with her daughter, grand daughter and all of their extended family. So is that the difference? Anyway, I did have a nice visit with Eileen and I'll get back to see her again. I feel good knowing she's in good hands. Eileen has a roommate who is 92 but she wasn't in the room..guess she's been there for 3 months. I asked what was wrong with her and Eileen said "nothing I can see, she looks like she's in her 70's and she just likes it here!" Good for her and does that not tell you something about that particular nursing home! Can't say that for poor Patty's nursing home. Patty said it was "horrible" and I agree with that. I couldn't sleep last night without thinking of poor Patty lying in the bed staring at the ceiling (which had stuff on it! Stuff on the ceiling!!). I can't wait to go back on Monday.
So is it my right to say anything to her family? To the nursing home? To anyone? I told my son and DIL my savings will be spent on taking care of Bob and I here in our home..when we run out of money and no one can take care of us then PULL THE PLUG...I don't want to live like my friend Patty. I know it's a controversial subject but there's something to be said about euthansia for animals but we let our own suffer.